The Gamer Who Cried White Wolf

I have written an article for Noobgrind, but first an explanation about why this matters so much to me, as well setting the stage for forthcoming articles. “White Wolf is coming!” I have been thinking this for over a year, ever since the Paradox Interactive announcement, I’ve been desperate to know what is going to happen. Writing about the subject of White Wolf feels bizarre to me; my head is full of conflicting inner-voices, different narratives competing for the privilege to justify particular opinions. This is in part because I know how important this is to some people, like myself, as well as to defend against the many anti-White Wolf role-players. Back in the 90s I ran some unusual games that helped me get a gaming job; for example a yearlong 16 player play-by-mail style World of Darkness games, which I will write about soon.


I often find talking about White Wolf games, in particular Vampire, is similar to discussing Dungeons & Dragons, the games mean different things to different people. It’s common to hear RPG generalisations further simplified in to meaningless soundbites like: “D&D is crap”, or “Vampire players are pretentious”. Years ago at conventions I’d meet players who hated White Wolf, but typically they struggled to explain why. I even came across claims that Vampire in particular had usurped D&D, which was a strange statement given the age and sheer size of D&D. Even quirkier since those conventions always had more D&D games being played than anything else, and this was before 3rd Ed came out. Also those people tended to conveniently forget what happened to TSR, it’s not that White Wolf beat D&D it’s more that they filled a void of sales at the local games shop. Maybe this type of chat was a big factor as to why so many players were offended by the idea of White Wolf, never mind the other big speculative factors I’ll not go in to here. Since White Wolf became a big deal in the RPG community, it was no surprise so many opinions were thrown around, since the games certainly sold.

Old World of Darkness, Trinity Universe, Exalted, Street Fighter


I have been accused of being a White Wolf fanboy, mainly by strangers; it’s a common enough insult some use when debating. Granted I have played the games a lot, yes for many years I was crazy and purchased all the books, as well as the spin-off games (CRPG, VTES, Rage, Changeling’s: Arcadia The Wyld Hunt, etc.), and even quite a few accessories. Once the old World of Darkness and Trinity Universe stopped I became a lot more selective about what I purchased. However, my regular players have played in a wide variety of role-playing games I’ve run (Cyberpunk, L5R, D&D, Champions, Warhammer, etc.), and as a group we have been critical of specific parts of all systems. I don’t think any rule system can be all things to all people, nor cover every possibility, thus I appreciate that my opinions of their products are very much subjective. I don’t see myself as blindly devoted, but I am definitely invested.

I don’t see myself as biased, just that I am invested.

In the 90s playing Jyhad (VTES) at The Tache (my regular nightclub)

I have written an article on Noobgrind about the recent Werewolf announcement, which can be read here. This news has helped motivate me to write some more gaming articles, in particular about some of the more unusual games I have ran.

I have previously written about the old White Wolf mostly excellent Street Fighter setting.

Kickstarter The PlayStation Revolution

I have written an article for NoobGrind about the new kickstarter The PlayStation Revolution

I have backed the Kickstarter, and hopefully it will be of at least the same quality as their previous work

I wrote reviews of the previous work:

Check it out at:

Review The Amiga Years

I previously wrote a blog about my review on NoobGrind for From Bedroom to Billions, I would recommend checking that out before reading my new review. Although I suppose you can watch them in either order, but the first documentary does provide an overview of the Amiga, and its place in the overall history of computing.

The Amiga Years, what a great documentary, well I guess that spoils my opinion, but I have written a lot more than this. Before watching the film I decided that I would delay writing a review, this way I would have time to reflect on the documentary; I didn’t want to come across as fanatical. Whilst I expected to be rewarded with another great product, I know it is not uncommon to be disappointed when armed with such passionate expectations. Thankfully I was not disappointed.

My own experiences with the Amiga are mostly focussed around the Amiga 500, although I have had a lot of access to other models. It was also great that by the end of the 80s more people I knew had also started getting access to home computers. My high school days were filled with all sorts of chats and a chance to play games at other peoples’ houses.

By the start of the 90s my dad was running a computer shop. This gave my more exposure to all aspects of computing, but particularly more games. The Amiga packs were a big part of the culture then, and it was a shame when the Amiga sales started getting increasing replaced by the IBM compatible PC machines. The capabilities of the PCs at the time still seemed terrible when compared to the range of Amigas, especially considering how cheap the Amiga 500 had become.

By the time I ran the shop in the mid-90s the Amiga was no longer selling, but thankfully the PC finally seemed to have caught up. It’s odd to recall what a difference there was in specifications and cost.

Given the tribal nature of our species it is no surprise that we form clans around a particular brand. I have been accused of being a PC fanatic, having had the luxury of access to them via our family’s computer business, but the reality is, as I mentioned in the last blog, I have had a lot of different computer brands. Although I’ve had a PC since 1995, if I had to pick a brand to be fanatic about it would be Commodore, and if I had to pick one machine in some sort of deathmatch, were era, cost and capability were weighted correctly, then I would pick the Amiga 500!

Please check out my new NoobGrind review The Amiga Years.

8-bit era & review From Bedrooms to Billions

I recently watched the documentary From Bedrooms to Billions by Anthony and Nicola Caulfield. I thoroughly enjoyed it, and I am looking forward to watching their new film The Amiga Years.

I have posted an article on NoobGrind about it, but whilst writing it I wrote several paragraphs explaining why this documentary meant to so much to me. However, given the size of that article, typical for me, I decided to cut the non-pertinent information from there, but decided to put it here.

My early childhood of growing up in England was dominated by the home computing revolution that took place at the start of the 80s. I was fortunate to have a father who had an interest in electronics, which lead him in to this new home computing hobby.

We started out with a Commodore Vic 20, then upgraded to a Commodore 64; I got my own Commodore 16. A few of our neighbours also got computers, one friend’s house had a Spectrum 48k, whilst another had various Amstrads, and another friend had an Atari 2600. At school we had a BBC Micro. Also living in Blackpool meant I could visit the arcade and compare those machines. So I was exposed to a multitude of systems, and I guess this is why I’ve tried to avoid being dedicated to just one system.

Commodore 64
One of my old Commodore 64 machines. Sadly I don’t have my original one, nor the vast game library I had.

I am not so obsessed with nostalgia that I want to return to those technologically inferior days. I have no issue with retro gaming, my main criteria is that the game has to be good. I acknowledge that some of the games that I have really enjoyed decades ago are of certainly of their era. It certainly wouldn’t make sense to insist that a player in the here and now has to play the ancient games; the term ‘has to’ is nasty. I think even old classics should generally be talked about only in context of their era.

A classic game that can still work well today is Street Fighter 2. It was amazing when it was released, and even with all the developments in the years since, it is still a great game. Whilst Way of the Exploding Fist came out years earlier, and was amazing when it was released, I can appreciate that the game is of its era. I did play it last year and I quite enjoyed it, but I don’t think most gamers would. I’ve previously written about how these two games helped form my role-playing passion, links below.

I ran a computer shop in the mid-90s, and I can recall chats about whether in the future there would be big interest in documentaries about the spread of computer gaming. It was agreed that computing would continue to develop, that interest would increase, but a few regular customers said they thought gaming would always be niche. The majority of my regulars thought the idea that gaming wouldn’t keep expanding was ludicrous, but those who thought gaming would stay relatively small pointed out how biased we were. A fair point to raise, but even back then the game sales figures showed a big trend towards ongoing expansion. This was during the period I referred to at the time as era of the Doom-virus; every PC sold, or even brought in to the shop for repairs, normally went out with the freeware 7 levels of Doom.


Given that I was dabbling with coding from 6 years of age, and trying to learn 6502 assembler at 8, I did ponder whether I should feel regret at not managing to make a game in that time period. I think it is fair to say I was a bit too young for the 8bit bubble. At the time I certainly never heard of young kids making games, whilst there were a few teenagers, even they were rare. By the time I was about 9 years old the Amiga was coming out, at the time I felt like what little progress I’d made had become pointless. When I went to high school at aged 11 I discovered AD&D and other role-playing games, and for many years I had little interest in computing. I actually felt weary of the subject, in part due to the terrible ‘I.T.’ lessons.

A few years ago I read Malcom Gladwell’s book Outliers, which highlights the importance of being in the right place at the right time, and what a small window it usually is. Crucially, since I did eventually go on to study programming and work at a games company, I did achieve major goals.

You can read my NoobGrind article here.

From Bedrooms to Billions

Follow-on review The Amiga Years

Way of the Exploding Fist 3 part series

Part 1 =

Part 2 =

Part 3 =


Cyberpunk RPG and CRPG: style and substance

I have written an article Cyberpunk 2077 a smart linked chromed sandbox for NoobGrind. My gaming group and I first watched the Cyberpunk 2077 trailer around the time it was released; I think we had been looking up something to do with Cyberpunk, whilst playing in a Cyberpunk tabletop role-playing session. We were quite excited, in part because the teaser trailer was well done, but additionally because CD Projekt Red was involved.

The person running the gaming session that night has probably run more Cyberpunk games than most people on the planet, including me, and I’ve run a silly amount. So for us the announcement of Cyberpunk 2077 was a big deal, as I’m sure it is for many other role players around the planet.

I was first introduced to the Cyberpunk 2013 whilst at high school, I think in 1989 via the Dungeons & Dragons (D&D). In 1987 I gamed just about every school lunchtime with some older lads, and via them I meet another old chap called Pete, although I forget exactly when. I had been introduced to some other systems via the D&D club, in particular Warhammer Fantasy/40K wargamming; I started collecting Skaven and Space Marines around then. Of course I had read Tolkien, as well as quite a lot of other fantasy and sci-fi, but looking back I don’t recall reading any cyberpunk books before 89. I think I had seen Dark Future in White Dwarf around this time.

Even back then Pete’s style of game mastering was different to the majority that I had experienced via the D&D club. There was a fun intensity combined with a mature character realism that was less common in most of the D&D games I had played; in part due to our ages. I got to know Pete a little bit, he was odd that he didn’t seem intimidated by people, he had mentioned studying Muay Thai, which I had seen on the telly as a young lad and I thought was psychotic and cool. I once saw Pete stand-up to a much bigger lad bullying people, the lad realised Pete was not worth the hassle and backed down. I think it was this confidence, as well as his relaxed attitude that gave Pete’s games an extra level of fun; it also helps that I was exposed to a new gaming system.

Back in the 80s there were not many cyberpunk style computer games, but my friends and I had at least had some solid reference points via movies, which helped us grasp the setting of Cyberpunk 2013 the RPG. The violence and cybernetics of Robocop was a big influence, the film noir style of Bladerunner, the example of ordinary humans trying to stop Arnie in The Terminator, and even psychic inspiration of a near future setting in Neo Tokyo of Akira.

By 1990 I had Cyberpunk 2020, and yet another expanding RPG book collection. At the time of writing this I started dictating gaming anecdotes about my Cyberpunk experiences, but I’ll save them for future articles.

I just hope that by the time Cyberpunk 2077 does come out, that I am healed enough to be able to play it without worrying about physical problems. Although I have Dragon NaturallySpeaking, if only real-life was as simple as buying a cyber arm for 3000eurodollars, as well as 1200 for a neural processor so I can get a Pain Editor!

NoobGrind Cyberpunk 2077 a smart linked chromed sandbox

Role-Play Timeline, article 2

Kaizo Trap review on NoobGrind + Update

Personal Update: My MRI scan revealed a lot fluid around my left shoulder, but thankfully no major structural damage was detected. The massive amount of swelling has slowly been reducing, since I am not doing much, which is incredible frustrating. The incredible levels of pain has reduced somewhat as the swelling has gone down, I still have chronic intense pain, so stating it has reduced is almost meaningless, but it is an improvement at least. Any hopes to go back training in February were quashed back in January, and it seems like the whole of March will be out as well.


NoobGrind: After weeks of not doing much, I have managed to use speech recognition to write an article about the incredible video called Kaizo Trap.


A whole bunch of other articles are planned, and maybe I’ll get another done soon. My enthusiasm about the subjects is somewhat demolished by the pain, and wariness of doing anything.

Gaming: Downplay studio importance

I have a new article up on NoobGrind. This one is about the idea of gaming studio legacy, and how for the most part it is not something that should be treated as important, although there are a few notable exceptions. I don’t have much extra to add to the article, other than I did delete a sizeable amount of swearing when I first wrote about publishers. It did get me thinking, surely there must be a publisher that deserves attention for not being a metaphorical incarnation of evil and capitalist extremism. If there is truly only anomalies to the norm than that really is a horrible indictment on the gaming industry.

In personal news: My MRI scan on 22 January 2016 went well, whilst it wasn’t as claustrophobic as the tunnel scanner, it was still somewhat due to the size of the machine.